The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
She needs sedatives and a leash
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize