Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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