i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
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