I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
