The brown eye won't let me do that either.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
