Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
what the fuck happened to the tacos
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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