I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
