He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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