you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
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