P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Randomize
