He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Randomize
