whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Randomize
