Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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