'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
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