you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Send help, water and tortillas.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
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