He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Randomize
