Got a toothbrush?
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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