party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
