Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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