Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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