I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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