so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Randomize
