What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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