no, he came in my armpit
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I think your dad took our porno
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize