I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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