What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
I supernannyed him into submission
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Randomize
