5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
