I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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