i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
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