can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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