No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
no you cant smoke seaweed
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
