is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
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