it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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