Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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