Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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