that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Randomize
