you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
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