I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize
