playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
