whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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