My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
We're too hungover to prance.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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