on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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