I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
