So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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