How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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