Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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