This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
