Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
