Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Randomize
