There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
You are a genius and a whore.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
