do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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